Originally intended to publish the following post from the Bangalore Airport itself....but like so many of my intentions this too failed ....
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For those who do not know, A Quantum of Solace is the name of the new James Bond movie starring Daniel Craig.
But this post is not about Mr Bond, nor is it about the pouting, irreverent Mr Craig.
This post is about a certain Mr Shivaram (name changed), Customs Inspector at Bangalore International Airport.
This post is about a certain Mr Shivaram (name changed), Customs Inspector at Bangalore International Airport.
Yesterday, on my way out of the country, I wanted to declare a laptop and a camera I was carrying (I have never done this declaration bit before and so was pretty excited thinking how I will demolish yet another item from my …heard-of-it-but-do-not-know-what-it-is list).
The well situated and prominent Customs Desk behind the immigration counter was...vacant. Looking around, I found no one, but noticed a small piece of paper stuck on the customs board. It gave the name of the Customs Inspector and his mobile no.
The well situated and prominent Customs Desk behind the immigration counter was...vacant. Looking around, I found no one, but noticed a small piece of paper stuck on the customs board. It gave the name of the Customs Inspector and his mobile no.
I waited for 10 minutes and then had to call the displayed cell number. Promptly an irate voice responded and confirmed that yes he was Mr Shivaram, Cusotms Inspector. His voice told me that this was not his best day.
He asked me what I wanted to declare…on hearing it is a laptop and camera, he said “Please go ahead, no problem”. I politely (or so Iconveniently remember) asked him when will he be at his seat. He answered with the same “Please go ahead, no problem”.
So now I had to tell him I wanted to declare the items, and needed him to come to his desk. When Mr Shivaram said he'll come in 10mins. I agreed to wait.
10mins goes without arrival of Mr Shivaram. Behind the desk, phone numbers of various customs officers were given starting from the Commissioner. With more people queuing up, I start calling the numbers displayed. Most of them numbers turned out to incorrect numbers. One Additional Commissioner did pick up the phone and informed that he’ll ensure the concerned Inspecter attends the counter in 2 minutes. How wonderful!!!
Mr S, a stately 50+ male, finally arrived 20mins after my call with the Additional Comms. You can make out that he was very, very upset. He starts with “Who is the person who phoned me?”
Putting up a brave front I declare that would be me. What followed was 15 minutes of non-stop diatribe on why I could have just gone ahead and did not need to bother him. The outburst continued to why the Govt of India allows Laptop, how "Techies" like me (this was not the first time that I was being wrongly branded into that elite brotherhood) are misusing the laptop rule, and the inevitable, how high-handed I was sounding as i was rambling off in ...English!
I had by then settled down in the chair before our man, trying to edge a word in and failing miserably.
Most of the queue vanished on its own and soon it was only me and Mr Shivaram with stray visitors passing through.
Mr S continued….he waxed eloquent on how difficult life is, how Laptops are becoming cheaper in India than anywhere else and HCL is introducing an INR10K laptop.
Somehow the conversation from a fiery diatribe moved to a Shakespearan solilquoy of sorts, switching from agression to self doubt to apathy to self-pity.
So now I had to tell him I wanted to declare the items, and needed him to come to his desk. When Mr Shivaram said he'll come in 10mins. I agreed to wait.
10mins goes without arrival of Mr Shivaram. Behind the desk, phone numbers of various customs officers were given starting from the Commissioner. With more people queuing up, I start calling the numbers displayed. Most of them numbers turned out to incorrect numbers. One Additional Commissioner did pick up the phone and informed that he’ll ensure the concerned Inspecter attends the counter in 2 minutes. How wonderful!!!
Mr S, a stately 50+ male, finally arrived 20mins after my call with the Additional Comms. You can make out that he was very, very upset. He starts with “Who is the person who phoned me?”
Putting up a brave front I declare that would be me. What followed was 15 minutes of non-stop diatribe on why I could have just gone ahead and did not need to bother him. The outburst continued to why the Govt of India allows Laptop, how "Techies" like me (this was not the first time that I was being wrongly branded into that elite brotherhood) are misusing the laptop rule, and the inevitable, how high-handed I was sounding as i was rambling off in ...English!
I had by then settled down in the chair before our man, trying to edge a word in and failing miserably.
Most of the queue vanished on its own and soon it was only me and Mr Shivaram with stray visitors passing through.
Mr S continued….he waxed eloquent on how difficult life is, how Laptops are becoming cheaper in India than anywhere else and HCL is introducing an INR10K laptop.
Somehow the conversation from a fiery diatribe moved to a Shakespearan solilquoy of sorts, switching from agression to self doubt to apathy to self-pity.
I learn from Mr S that he had spent some 14 years in Defence and then joined Customs, he is not enjoying the job (my brother), there is not enough recruitment into the department and they are short of hands.
to top it all, the pay is miserly. I interjected that with the new Pay Commission, he should now be rich. He totally dismissed that saying it is all an eyewash and quoted newspaper reports to prove his point. BTW, for those of you wondering, I still had some 2 hours to catch the flight.
In then meanwhile he did agree that I can declare the camera and no need to bother about the Laptop.
I filled the declaration form while he recollected his two year stint in Panagarh (a town off Kolkata) and fondly remembered the Bengali desert “Chhanar Payash”.
I got to know his take home salary and how he plans to not work beyond another 5 years. He also compared his present salary to Infy campus hire scales adding how lopsided it is. I could not agree more.
We shook hands, he wished me safe trip, I thanked him. I continued with the smug feeling that by sharing his woes with me, I may have given Mr Shivaram a quantum of solace.
In then meanwhile he did agree that I can declare the camera and no need to bother about the Laptop.
I filled the declaration form while he recollected his two year stint in Panagarh (a town off Kolkata) and fondly remembered the Bengali desert “Chhanar Payash”.
I got to know his take home salary and how he plans to not work beyond another 5 years. He also compared his present salary to Infy campus hire scales adding how lopsided it is. I could not agree more.
We shook hands, he wished me safe trip, I thanked him. I continued with the smug feeling that by sharing his woes with me, I may have given Mr Shivaram a quantum of solace.
However, the deepening social chasm between the new economy and the old, as represented by a new age techie and a learned, senior but Government (or brick and mortar company) employee may well be the harbinger of greater social inequality. Breeding mutual dislike, it may just spiral into hatred.
If that happens a quantum of solace may not be as easily achieved as what Mr Shivaram got that evening.
so, had a good time pass, eh?
ReplyDeleteoh yes...next time you are travelling ...do catch up with this interesting charecter.
ReplyDeleteKudos comrade for bringing forth that anecdotal twist to your "harrowing" experience, which most of us have faced at one time or another by virtue of some frustrated assumptions about how things are easy on the rest of the lot.
ReplyDeleteClaims made by our protagonist may seem outright reactionary, and would have provoked little attention if the arguments supporting them were the rantings of a red-brigade crank. But it's really difficult to dismiss them as perfunctory. Though his views may not rank upon the scholarly, or respectful, it's no doubt thought-provoking. And as you found out, they also perpetually spawn unstable interpretations :))
...do you think we might catapult him to the forefront of some intellectual think-tank??...now, why does that phrase always make me think of a water tank :/
-Louise
@ Louise : Heh heh...every frustrated employee (and most of us are) i guess end up as closet quasi philosphers reminscing on our plight and how others have it better than us. Think tank/water tank ... whatever, the guy was certainly canTANKerous!
ReplyDeleteThe experience you had eerily resembles one I once had,again,on my way out of the country.The Customs officer(though not aged enough to be branded as an old school)sometime had tried his luck in Chartered Accountancy and failed.
ReplyDeleteThe moment he got to know tag I carry after my name,his volcano of hatred erupted and I found myself in great danger(almost bordering on jeopardizing my imminent trip to US)being part of a fraternity he failed to join-despite trying hard repeatedly.....it sounded as if I inadvertently had occasioned his failure.I had to suffer his harangue for a while(as for those who do not travel abroad - listen to whatever they say,always, and never ask back)until I conceded my mistake in qualifying CA.
I was released with a smile on 'his' face.....and had a smooth flight!